Khamûl

Feb. 5th, 2006 03:49 pm
stuntie_jed: (black rider)
The body was smaller than he is used to, but seemed well put together, adequate. The place is harder. The light, there is so much light. Even the stars, which he hates for what they represent, even the stars are veiled by the light.

And the air, the darkness sniffs, trying to orient himself. But the air is dead, tells him nothing. But more than dead . . . it is poisoned. A smile twitches his lips.

He had answered a call, half heard, half felt. Not from his lord, but from his lord’s lord. Duty nonetheless, and allegiance owed. Power to be had, to be taken.

He reaches out for his brothers, for together they are a force that not many can withstand. But he cannot find them, no echo of their spirits, no rumour of their passing in shadows on the living. So he is alone.

But there is strength in him still and he will do what is required of him. )

Going Bush

Jan. 31st, 2006 09:07 pm
stuntie_jed: (Jed)
Howard released everyone except Karl who has to do his pretend fighting the alien out there in the fjords against the green screens. Some of the crew are still there finishing, too. Mark took off to look for some wine, but I nicked away home as soon as I could. Going bush though, like I told Mark. He seemed to think it’s right cracker idea. Funny bloke, weird one, but he’s got a good heart.

I get Sid from the place where I board him, and rent a horse caravan, heading out for Mt. Taranaki. I have a moment’s worry when I think about a blackout hitting me when I’m off on my own, so I leave a message for Pete telling him where I’m going, but knowing damn well that’s he’s off pressing flesh for the awards season. So I’ve got insurance, but not a chocka.

What I’m hoping is this little trip to the wop-wops will get the fuck rid of my stress, and I’m really hoping that stress is making me crook and giving me those time slips. If not . . . I sigh. I guess I’ll call a doc when I get back.

I’m humming along to the radio as I drive up the coast. Fucking gorgeous day, and I’m looking forward to some time on my own. Taranaki looms into sight and I stop at the ranger station and buy a pass for three days for a horseback site. I park and get Sid unloaded and settled. We head out for the trails almost immediately and it’s so fucking tempting to disappear into the wilderness, leave my shit behind.

The darkness stirred but saw nothing of interest in the trees and rocks, and thus slept again.

Sid snorts and shies a bit, and I look around, but don’t see anything. He probably got spooked by a leaf or something. Big sook.

A New Path

Dec. 27th, 2005 03:47 pm
stuntie_jed: (shadow jed)
Another night of no sleep, my second-hand bed cold and uncomfortable. Nothing feels right and I toss and turn for hours, finally getting up, unable to bear being alone with my own thoughts anymore. I try to distract my brain from circling around and around in the same grotty path that leads to me wanting to punch something. Porno mags don’t appeal right now, and the telly has fuck-all on this time of night. There’s cartons piled all around, but I tell myself this isn’t my real life so there’s no point in unpacking them.

After a couple of hours of pacing, my body’s so knackered that all I can think about is getting some kip, but my brain is still racing, seeing my kids when she pulled away from the house, their faces blank, not understanding. God damnit! I can’t do this!

I’m not going to live through this, I’m a rat-bag and I can’t do this. )

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